by Mark DeNicola |
When we find ourselves stuck in a situation that just doesn’t sit well with us, whether it be a relationship, job, or social outing, the best solution can often be to remove ourselves from it. It may be difficult to do so, but in the long-run we certainly do ourselves and anyone else it impacts a favour by opting not to force ourselves to be a part of something in which we feel uncomfortable.
(Note: I’m certainly not suggesting that we run from everything we’re responsible to or for, but I am referring to those interchangeable circumstances in our life that many of us choose to dwell in longer than we’d like to for all the wrong reasons.)
But what about those instances where we truly feel stuck in a situation for at least an extended period of time? How can we better operate within those circumstances to both make them less challenging and eventually less permanent? Here are 6 ways to shift your attitude towards an uncomfortable situation:
1. Remember & Accept The Process
Many of us are “naturally” end-goal oriented. When we think about our jobs we focus on the money we’ll make on our next paycheque or the higher position we can get promoted to. When we think about sex we focus on reaching a climax. As wonderful as end goals can be, there is always an equally as interesting process involved in getting there.
The same goes for when we find ourselves stuck in a situation. Rather than letting the situation overwhelm you, choose to take a step back and look at it from a bird’s eye view. Everything is a part of a process, including you recognizing that you no longer want to be a part of what you are stuck in. Just because you may not be able to step out of it right now, doesn’t mean you aren’t amidst a bigger process that will get you out of it eventually.
2. Appreciate The Awareness
We’ve all heard the saying “ignorance is bliss,” and I’ll follow it up by saying “so is awareness.” Your ability to recognize and come to terms with you not fitting in with a particular situation is quite the thing to be grateful for. Even if you can’t get out of it right away, find an attitude shift in the fact that you do have a strong enough connection with yourself to realize when something doesn’t jive with you.
3. Don’t Take It So Seriously/ Avoid Being The Drama King or Queen
Stress has become such a predominant experience that aside from when we are sleeping, many of our bodies are probably used to trying to operate in fight or flight mode. As helpful as this mode can be for those instances when we may be unexpectedly attacked by a bear, it’s probably pretty tiring for our bodies to react the same way when we are simply sitting at a desk doing a job we aren’t passionate about. I’m a strong believer that the more serious you make an issue (or the more drama you create surrounding it), the more you strengthen its existence. Instead, accept that it’s there, recognize that getting dramatic serves no purpose, and see what steps you can take to go beyond it.
4. Make Changes In Other Aspects Of Your Life
Just because this particular situation can’t be changed in this moment doesn’t mean that other ones in your life can’t be changed as well. Find ways to incorporate the things that you are passionate about in your daily life. I’ve found that regularly making time to do something you are passionate about can do wonders for improving your attitude and well-being, even if just for a few minutes a day.
5. Take What You Can From It
As Kelly Clarkson reminds us all in pop song ‘Stronger,’ what doesn’t kill you certainly does make you stronger in this life, and a situation or circumstance that you are stuck in is no exception. There is always something to be gained from any situation, and it’s often when we choose to stop being dramatic in our reaction to it that these lessons become apparent – even if the lesson is as simple as strengthening your level of patience and trust. (Funny note: I can’t believe I actually used Kelly Clarkson as my intro to explaining this point)
6. Talk To Others Honestly About It
There is a great power in honest conversation, yet many of us rarely choose to engage in it. If you find yourself stuck in a circumstance, talk to someone about it. And please be clear that I don’t mean spend hours bi**hing about it to them, but instead tell them about it and how it’s making you feel. Even if they can’t offer you any valuable bits of advice or clarity, you may inspire them to look at things in their own life that they may be keeping in place for all of the wrong reasons.
What are you thoughts on these 6 ways to change your attitude towards a situation you can’t immediately change or leave? Is there anything else you may recommend based on experience? Let us know via the comment section below!
by Mark DeNicola