by Pieter Navis |
So then, the relationship of self to other is the complete realization that loving yourself is impossible without loving everything defined as other than yourself.
For me there is the idea that there is no such thing as progress or stagnation or decline. Sure, all three are present, but it all changes continuously. I realize that I am not the identification with a possibility of progress. Instead I seem to be observing the process of progress and decline.
A lot of old pain came to the surface last year and with it came a lot of old thoughts and ideas about how everything works. Then I noticed that I think I know how the world works, but really have no idea. However, we seem to be constantly working to strengthen our worldview and dig trenches to defend ourselves from the world. But what are you actually defending? You defend a picture in your mind that consists of emotions, thoughts and speculations. It has no base in reality.
Releasing. I think that’s the whole process that everyone always talks about in spirituality. About the pain of letting go , the resistance against it and the changes that take place unnoticed. Once I understood what really was meant by non-duality , I realized how little I knew, and especially that I’ve always known this, but was afraid to admit. Now there is no need to prove myself or win a dispute. Everything happens as it is; I can think about this or just accept it as it is.
The next step was that I looked at the I. The once stable self and its self-image had a hard time last year.Then there is something striking.. the information I ‘ve “found” last year is close to perfect in the given situations.
It really seems that you get what you need at any moment, whether you like it or not. In my situation it wasn’t always fun, because the more and more I came to the conclusion that the self that felt so stable, is nowhere to be found, and then to learn to trust that you can live without self.. it takes time. For everything that has conditioned you in your life , comes up. Everything which you cling to must be detached.
Because what you are ultimately, is that which remains in the silence. To test this, if you are thinking too much, try to be silent for 5 seconds. In those 5 seconds everything disappears which isn’t real to you, including your thoughts. But we are so identified with and amazed by our thoughts, that it doesn’t occur to us that our thoughts are not our thoughts at all. Find out for yourself where thoughts come from, where do they go? What is the basis of the mind?
The process is not easy no .. because it means that you lose yourself. If you dare to push through, you’ll find the emptiness which is uncovered by the melting of the self, until you get to the bottom of the void. The void which includes everything but in itself is empty. No Nothing, not all .. it precedes both, it creates both..
What I would give to people who think they are not too far on ‘ the path ‘.. fear not! Just go see what is out there in the field of meditation and mindfulness. There are also simple walking exercises, so you don’t have to sit still on a pillow for an hour to make progress. Meditation is ultimately only a means that may lead to the goal : non-meditation. Meditation without you being consciously involved in meditating.
So no self which meditates.. no .. but a return to the ground of who we really are. The emptiness that creates and is always empty.. Try not to change yourself.. Instead, put your energy into accepting who you are right now and at all times. How could you ever be more than you are right now? You are, you don’t need more, do you? Only thoughts think being isn’t good enough.. but there is ignorance in this.
Thoughts are manifestations of separation, duality. For the mind is a medium that receives the thoughts. If you do not identify with your mind but just live as if thoughts were guests who come to visit you, you can learn to deal with them and stand above them. If you receive guests, would you let them take over your entire household? Why do we let our minds do this? Are thoughts really ours??
by Pieter Navis